Is it because there's nothing exciting to talk about MYF that's why my blog was just blank up til prolly now? There's alot of things to ponder when people are forced to change and adapt a new rule or setting or routine. At first it is always harder to get into the new time slot. We naturally get excited. Once we've figured out how troublesome it is to come more than once to KL in a week, we get alil sulky over the inconvenience. Actually that's really not the problem. Or is it? So not everyone benefits from the change of system.

Would the committee be looking deeply into the matter, that not all the sheeps are happy.

my vote is yes, they ought to find out and find solutions to the matter. It's really irritating when we open one question and just because there's no absolute right answer to it, its left hanging in mid air and prefixed our minds that the best answer is 'only God knows'. Well true, only God would know what would be the best answer, but we on earth will not necessarily gather His wisdom hands at work. Im not being sarcastic. I know my life is in His hand and He's a better navigator than I am a billion times more & more. But would it really take some big catastrophy to get our attention just for God to be more audible or perhaps my ears and eyes to be removed of the wax and scale to finally see that YES, GOD IS DOING SOMETHING while I wasn't paying attention.

I think what's stinging in my heart is that Lord though we didn't pray for numbers. But I do hope that the remaining no. were consistent.

there's much more in my thoughts. so many questions.

Chap Goh Meh - 15th day of Chinese New Year.
No more angpaos til the next year. BTW, those of you who are rather shocked how serious this blog of mine is turning out. Redirect to my livejournal. Its not too hard to find if u know my username. *hint is my cobwebbing website.

I thought this year's income would had dropped by 50% but it seems like I collected almost the same amount as last year. Im slowly spending them off. Its bad when I carry my money all around wherever I go.

I would wanna start journalling my christian perspective of the dual lives Im living in. In the world but not of the world. To constantly remind myself, holiness is the step everyone must take, before expecting changes to whack hard.

Reunions - Great custom, tradition, that signifies the importance of relationship. Esp. Family relationships. Being one person that just never moved from my original spot for 20 years. I see ppl moving forward and leaving. I see ppl coming back to their roots and making effort to fit in once again. Whereas, I stay rather neutral, and not changing too much. But I see changes. Ppl not being treated like kids anymore, cousins establishing their own careers. Aunties wondering whenever they gonna have my generation to start seeding and bear fruits after hanging so long on the parent tree. Its wonderful to have a family to belong to. That's CNY for me.

Moving On - Argh, I never liked farewells. I can count and there's at least 5 ppl Im gonna miss or already missing quite a bit. And some which have dropped hints of leaving not soon, which makes it quite an aggravating waiting period. I wonder too if I will ever leave the nest. Im asking for jobs that can keep me in kl. The grass is greener somewhere beyond my nest. If Im ever gonna leave, Im sure I won't give myself time to even think, cos thinking twice will make me chicken out of it. Yeah, it might an abrupt departure, if that happens.

Questions that ran inside my head, n they have cleared,
"why leave our country?"
"why all the bother getting PR?"
"No where is actually better, compared to home"

I asked, n asked and asked. Yes, I got my answers for them.
Musn't refuse to let go of birds that have learnt how to fly and find another nest of their own.

Promoting God - Its not illegal, neither it is easy. We often like to be comfortable. If we aren't, means we don't find peace in where we are placed in. So is God the clutch that only the 'weak' hold on to? I actually agree with it after many years of finding it a contempt.
Using religion as an excuse to make oneself feel better about their weaknesses? The horror to hear such statements coming from close friends. Used to, but now I understand, how much they don't understand. The more I must not be shutting out opinions that reflects another's perspective. "God also need ppl to do sales and the pastor is promoting God in church every sunday, won't you agree?" I believe this came from a non-christian. But the statement is not entirely agreeable. How the world perceives sales & marketing is very different from how God does His branding. Spiritual food (daily bread, His word) is what God wants His ppl to be constantly feeding on. Somehow, we are just refusing to take in such food daily because of our mixed up priorities? our own personal ambitions and dreams? our own fantasies. It's really all about making ourselves happy yah? temporary happiness. God sends us loads of reminders. Ever stop being busy and observe? They don't come in dramatic forms, but direct messages from the pulpit. Yah, so what yer doing going to church every sunday mate?